0530 – Wake up before alarm goes off. Am showered and ready to go by 0600. Tool is 11 minutes late picking me up. I go stir crazy for 31 minutes.
0730 – Meet up with Dr. J, brother of famous internet poker celebrity (FIPC) at the gate. We discover that by an act of sheer oddity that we are all seated together, yet on two separate reservations.
0915 (VST) – We touch down at McCarren.
0930 – I walk by hot stripper girl on the moving walkway. I get off to check flight information with Dr. J for FIPC’s arrival. I get back on walkway and pass hot stripper girl again. She is convinced that I just tried to look at her, twice. I am convinced that her name is Candy and she is a little to self absorbed, and not quite hot enough to have that much attitude. Dr.J and Tool argue about how much “enhancement” she has had.
0955 – FIPC is able to make his way through the paparazzi and find the St. Louis boys standing at luggage carousel #5.
1010- In cab on way to Aladdin.
1045 – Playing PaiGow because there are no games going on in the Aladdin poker room
1130 – Informed that there is a gas leak on the strip. The gas has been turned off which means that there is no hot water and not way to cook lettuce wraps at PF Changs. Walk tothe Cantina at the Showcase mall for mexican food.
1150 – Audible, we eat at the Harley Davidson cafe
1300 – The four of us drop $60 to play in the 1:00 PM tournament at the Aladdin. Tool makes the final table but does not cash. I play one hand and get my AK outflopped by AJ. I play one pot and bust.
1400 – Seated at a 2/4 LHE table I proceed to prove that I am not the worst player in the world.
1900 – The Jesus Buster starts to play the 7pm Aladdin tourney.
2100 – Jesus Buster wins tourney, go figure.
2230 – We get the boys rounded up to head to the IP.
2400 – STB and Tool both refuse the tequila shots I buy them. Thats right, STB is a big puss. Tool gets Maudie to drink his shot. Drizz steps up and takes one for the team. Tool <> Wisconsin.
0030 – Still at the IP. Pit boss raises limits on PaiGow table. WTF is that?
0230 – Chicken Fries and sourdough burgers at O’Sheay’s courtesy of Tools PAIGow heater and the holding power of the human rat hole.
0400 – I make first prop bet of the trip. I take the over of 7:30 on when FIPC will return to the room
0600 – I lose prop bet.
1100 – Lettuce wraps and orange chicken at PF Changs.
1215 – Poker at the MGM
1900 – I flop quads
2300 – I switch places with Maigrey. She plays my stack for a couple of orbits and I go play the Razz orbit of horse. Just a few hands previous Daddy took up residence in the 10 seat at my NL table. As I leave, I tell Maigs to “double me up”. I play two pots in Razz, win one and lose one. When I come back Daddy is pissed and I am doubled. You see Daddy flopped two pair and Maigs with her 4d2d flopped a straight and a flush draw. Daddy moved in and she called with 13 outs twice. She hit a straight and a flush on the river and doubled me up. Daddy was seen later replaying the hand in the MGM sportsbook. I tell everyone that I have discovered the road to poker success.
2400 – I bust and rebuy. I lose to a set when I get it in on the turn with TPTK and the nut flush draw.
0100 – I double up and am up for the session when I get to see a cheap turn with TT on a JJx board. Turn is a T. I get check raised or raised and move all in. The guy tells the table that the only hand he is behind is JT. His AJ misses the 4 outs on the river.
0330 – The four of us decide that the walk from the MGM to the Aladdin is much sketchier than it used to be. The combined $8000 we have on us makes us think about our own mortality.
0430 – In bed with bankroll in tact.
1100 – Eating Lobster Chowder and Fish tacos at Caesars.
1200 – Playing the 1-2 $500 max at Caesars. I can’t believe how many people buy in short. I am up $200 in a matter of minutes.
1315 – I lose about $75 to Drizz when my KK is cracked by his JJ. He cold calls me with position pre-flop and calls again on the flop of AJx. A on the turn and I check fold face up. He flashes me the JJ.
1415 – I’m in the tourney and get AA and steal the blinds.
1430 – Did I mention that Otis is on my right, MiamiDon is on his right and CC is on my left. I am at Waffles’ table. Good god.
1445 – I get AA and steal the blinds
1515 – I get KK, four callers, an A flops and the SB bets out.
1518 – I am so tilted at this point that CC gets me a massage table side. Thanks man. In that kind of way crackheads thank their dealers. I am now addicted to table side massage.
1545 – I bust after getting JJ in against QQ and then 66 against TT. Stupid bloggers.
1600 – I join Maigs and Tool at a 3/6 table. I am way too tilty to play NL. I proceed to run my stack up to $140 and down to $40.
2300 – Still playing 3-6 I have $44 in front of me. I limp with 33 in EP. guy to my left raises, Tool reraises. Before I act the guy to my left asks the dealer how much more he can make it. The dealer tells him $3 more to a total of $12. I tell him no he can’t and I pop it to $12. Guy then makes it $15, capping the action, Tool calls and I call. Flop comes 3xx. We cap the flop. The turn is a blank and the river is a blank. All cards are unders and there is a lack of action. I can’t get my last $4 in as I bet out an no one will raise me. Tool is happy I won the pot (yeah, right). I think the kid is going to cry. Yes that was a $125 3/6 pot.
2400 – Tool and I mosey to the IP.
0001 – We then go to the MGM for a late night session.
0245 – I get to the IP to play PaiGow.
0430 – I leave the PaiGow table up $100. I do this by pressing my last hand for $75 and hitting.
0445 – I walk into O’Sheay’s to see if the food court is open. The only thing in O’Sheay’s at this time of the morning is rednecks fighting with white trash. I stare at the floor and make my way to the Aladdin.
0505 – I knock on the door, Tool lets me in.
0510 – Otis unleashes some sort of biological warfare that makes my eyes water. Tool calls the UN to see if weapons inspectors will come investigate.
1100 – Fatburger bitches.
1200 – 3/6 Limit at Ceasars. Ceasars is the nicest poker room on the strip. I avoid playing th 1/2 NL game because I want to book the win and make it to the IP for some drinks.
1500 – Tool and I walk into the IP sportsbook. I get to hang for the last little bit with a dwarf, the least effeminate single straight skinny white man over 30 (LESSSWMO30), Romo Homos, drunken hippies, cool dealers, OK Okies, a princess, AL Fans, a mexican hitman, an Aussie and several others that I am surely forgetting.
1605 – I make sure to say goodbye to everyone I see. I will not be at the next tourney in summer 2007. I won’t be there in winter 2007. Debbie Downer doubts that there will be anything beyond. He might be right. So unless you make it to the ‘Lou I doubt I will see any of you very soon.